I have actually come to many insights on my stay here. I though it would be mostly about training when I got here, but since I started school it has been so much moore. I haven't been able to just focus on training.
Alot of the people I have met here, have been very forward and outgoing, good crazy and sometimes bad crazy. I sometimes actually feel normal compared to them. I have felt like the quiet one.
And I have really been forced to practice the listening side of myself. Because I'm usually the one that talks all the fucking time and takes up alot of space. (As many of you know..)
And I am very curious of what this change in my own behavior comes from. And I am yet to find out.
I'm quite exicted! I love finding new sides of myself.
Every week and day is almost the same, and I really enjoy my daily routine. Training, eating and going to school. And talking to Jimmy. Nom. <3
Since I've come here, me and Jimmy have been able to talk by Skype or Viber every day. And if we hadn't done that I don't think I would have been able to feel this good as I do now. I probably would have felt more alone. Or I would have been "forced" to talk more to people. And maybe some think that's a bad thing, but for me I think I has been good for me.
I really like my alone time I have here. The calm and quiet times I get to spend with just myself.
One of my favorite realisations is one I'm a little bit ashamed of.
That the people here as just like everywhere else, and also in many ways diffrent. But still the same. They have the same behaviours and habits and feelings as the people I know back in Sweden.
It's so easy to get a twisted picture of Thais when you just have been travellering around and never really gotten to know them but just seen them as someone who's just trying to get you to buy some junk you don't need, or chasing you to get you to take a taxi, or giving you a massage, or serving you a drink at the bar. Just because you can't talk to them as fluently as you can with people back home.
That language berrier is a good reason I've had this picture. And maybe no real intrest in getting to know them.
But during the time here I really like the people I have gotten to know, I love to hear their storys about their lives and how they have gotten to the point in their life they are today. Life is truly awesome <3
And the summary of this realisation is that I really love people. I love them for their goodness that's in their heart and their beauty. All people are truly amazing. Even the struggling onces.
I get to test my patient with the people who I don't understand and realise that they are just people who's had things in their lives that maybe I havn't and made themself who they are because that's the way they thought was right or the only way. And that's allright aswell. This comes to all people, all over the world.
So here is a picture of a coconut! Fresh coconutmeat look a lot like semen if you scrap it together.
Just so you know. <3
XXX
Johanna
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